What do you wear, and at what time of day?

This post was inspired by (and in response to) Urspo's recent blog entry, which can be found here: https://sporeflections.wordpress.com/2018/08/13/urspo-gets-dressed/

I admire all your planning, as I seem to pick something from the top of the disorganized clothes heap (which consists of geological layers with most recently worn at the top)  and hope it has not been worn enough times to smell less like laundry detergent and more like a person (specifically, like a person multiplied by the number of days worn all day). 

That is, if I even change out of pajamas before walking the dog.  I just said this morning, "I don't mind walking the dog in pajamas early in the morning (that is, until 10AM) or late at night (anytime after dark), but I feel like I should put real clothes on if it's middle of the day."  I mean, I don't even wear pajama pants to sleep (I do wear something, just not long pants), but I do put pajama pants on before venturing outside or even outside my bedroom.  I did wear winter hiking boots outside in the grass today with pajamas - and paused to consider whether I might look ridiculous doing do - but the grass was wet - who wants slippers or sandals soaked by all that wet grass?  NOTE:  I live in an apartment community and I often say:  "What happens in ____, stays in ____."  Meaning: I like to think of all of us living here as a loose-knit family of sorts, and especially in the evening and early morning, seeing one another walking dogs in pajamas should be just as natural as seeing a roommate or relative settled in for the evening in an easy chair.  I have considered often that I'd walk the dog within the neighborhood confines in pajamas, but if I had to venture onto any other public street, I would not - so I'm sure the community effect is partly at play here.

Female equivalent of the Bellman's curse:  Will throw on sweater and drive someone to work or other errand in which I don't have to emerge from the car once there, without upper undergarment, but it's best applied because:  Speedbumps.  Or being seen in public, if going into the store or something.  I don't know when that happened last due to poor planning, but it would necessitate layers of sweaters or preferably a heavy coat and maybe finding excuses to have poor posture (such as leaning over a grocery cart as if too tall to stand up straight, even though it's not really true) to hopefully escape notice.  I'm learning it's best to just keep it on at all times unless actually in bed, despite the inconvenience and time needed (about 10 seconds; but only 2 to remove.)  I know you'll file this under information you'll never need to use.

p.s. I don't actually know what the Bellman's Curse is, but I've decided not to look it up or ask what it is; I think I'd rather leave it a minor mystery.

Progress report on he who progresses

Previously weight was over 230 and is now mid-220s.  And yet another medication has been ditched, as usual preceding next week's scheduled consult with physician.  I tend to think levothyroxine was never needed, but let's see what the endocrinologist has to say.  For those cases with not-so-interesting lab values and no symptoms... Hmm...   And some troublesome new developments arose  (several episodes of heart rate 160 while sitting around doing nothing?), prompting the ditching of this questionable med.  All good and healthy-seeming for now, so let's see what Dr. Lab-Result-Scrutinizer has to say next week.

This was another development, but let me tell you, this is not him:

Not insomnia as the pictured bed may imply, but that facial expression is a carbon copy:  Just a constant "on alert" or "on edge" feeling as it was described to me, as if waiting for a knock on the door... Unable to relax.  And it was not related to the 160 heart rate, which showed up out of nowhere.  The 160 beats per minute (or higher, he wouldn't let me see the BP machine so he may have understated, but I felt it on the wrist and it was scary to count, made me sick) came and went within 20 minutes or so, but happened three times over the course of about one week, and has not happened since the discontinuation of those tiny tablets.

BP, by the way, still good. Was sort of high (130s) during one of those unsettling tachycardia episodes and better (110s) during another, so no correlation that I can detect. Normally I get to see the BP machine and it's average 120, often 110s, highest ever seen was 141 or low as 96, over something appropriate like 70-something.  Heart rate generally 80s, but that's better than when it used to be 100 all the time.  The 160-BPM runs are obviously not due to exertion or momentary anxiety, but an outright malfunction.  The first time he blamed it on drinking a pot of coffee prior but the working theory now is the levothyroxine.

What I can and cannot do

Spo's lists are so much fun - I can't help but copy and paste the things he says he cannot do and comment on whether I can or cannot.  Maybe I'll add a few!  Everyone take it from here.  Either copy Spo's list or mine, or both as I will type them, or make up your own... just do SOMETHING!


Spo cannot:
And I will talk about it a little:

Whistle.  I can, but not the loud stadium-style - wish I could.
Operate the TV entertainment system. Can't do it, either.
Throw a ball.  A wimpy, short distance, yes, and I surprise people by hitting a baseball or softball out of the park on first try.  That's the extent of my sports skills, though.
Understand ‘violence as entertainment”.  I don't get it, either.  I also don't like the sex scenes or even the gross close-up kisses, not because I am personally a prude, but some things are for doing, not for watching others do.
See a spider without going into hysterics. Same, although I caught and set free in the wild a small one yesterday, then asked for praise from the people who were sleeping while I did it.
Make a decent onion soup.  Never tried. 
Remember the difference between Linda Ronstadt and Pat Benatar.  I get some artists confused, but never connected those two in my mind.
Hit a high C.  Can't do it either, and I strain around the F and G right below... not a standard female voice range.  Seems I'm a tenor or even a high baritone or let's be realistic, I just don't have a wide range.  But I'm very proud of hitting the B2 easily - I recently outdid Diana Krall on that where she flaked out and I did it.
Roll my tongue. Yes, I can.
Eat rats a Tewkesbury. Don't know if I can, but I think I'll skip trying.
Eat just one potato chip I can't eat just one, either.
Eat in peace without Harper begging for something.  That's what dogs do.
Properly spell without spell-check < chandelier; medieval; calendar; prejudice. I can spell anything first try - and I mean with a very, very low failure rate.  It's always been my trademark skill.  However, Spo pushes my vocabulary to expand.
Sit through Die Walkure without falling asleep at least once. Have not tried it.  Will wear dark sunglasses if I do, though, so no one will notice the snooze.
Vote Republican. I don't even vote most of the time.  Yes, I know, boo, hiss.
Drink coconut-based cocktails. Would never try.  Do like coconut in cakes/candy, though.
Remember where I last put my keys. Pocketbook, backpack... you need SOMETHING or this will happen repeatedly.  Pockets?  Otherwise I'd lose them constantly.
Smoke more than one cigar at a time. Don't smoke any.
Go fifteen minutes without checking my cellphone. Well, yeah.  We all think something interesting will come in and we will make 1,500 checks for every one semi-riveting tidbit we may find fresh on our phones.
Finish reading “Stranger in strange land” Haven't even started.
Remember the day Brother #4’s birthday. Easy because one is on the 1st, and the other two are both on 7th of different months (one of those months being the same month as the one on the first.)  Easy, right?
Feel it isn’t my fault when I don’t hear from someone in a long while.  Wow, I am quick to blame other people for being jerks.  I admit I may, depending on circumstances, momentarily wonder if it was something I said, but I choose to believe that others need to modify their behavior - try it and see if you like that better!
Drive a stick-shift. Learned on one and was then afraid to try automatic.  Ha!
Sit still. I guess I do.  Do you burn a lot of calories fidgeting?  Sometimes I shake a foot or tap a pencil.  Energy to burn?
Understand the rules of football.  Never understood them and don't care to - not a sports fan.
Remember who won of The Thirty Years War.  You remember better than I do.
Listen to “Don’t Stop Believing”. If you've heard it once, do you need to hear it again?

When it really doesn't matter

We've all heard the trite truism that it should not matter to you what people think of you.  Easier said than adopted as a heartfelt attitude.  Isn't it natural to care, somewhat?

Well, in the broadest sense, of course.  We're social animals who can't risk alienating everyone; we have to keep our heads low and keep quiet at the right times - it's a matter of [social] survival.  And maybe survival in general.  But if we try, we can separate out what's necessary (being civil, not actively and recklessly making enemies) and what consists of opportunities we've been failing to take because we worry that others will judge us negatively or think the wrong things about us.

There's a lot to be gained from working on that goal of self-confidence:  Not putting much stress-out energy into the opinions of others on what you say or do.

I can tell you that I've learned it's really worth working on, though.  It's freeing, if somewhat scary, to go out on the tightrope and know that you'll find out who your friends are, and even worse, what your friends actually think. Which might even prompt you to sort more finely the category of which people you consider to be your friends.

I guess I've gotten old enough that I've learned:  If I don't take the bus now, another one might not come by.  And I'm not waiting till everything seems perfect.  If I lose some friends along the way, so be it.

Believe it or not, after all this suggestive narrative, I'm not even going to reveal or provide all specifics of what I've been working on.  It's not a secret or anything - it's just that I didn't intend this to be a conduit.  And also, specifics aren't needed - this is all-encompassing and generalized, even if I there are particular areas in the zoom-view that have been integral to my attitude adjustment.  Even if you haven't figured out anything specific you want to launch in your life yet, you can still adopt this attitude - it doesn't matter which comes first - it's the "don't care" attitude that's important, although the sooner you employ it, the better.

Tying into the above: Another lesson I've learned is that I should select carefully where I express and promote myself.  Sorry, blog readers, you're going to have to ask (individually) if you want more.  Then I'll happily provide it, if I vaguely know you.  Sadly, a consequence of my new re-evaluation of how/when/where I express myself is that I'm not sure if I'll continue this blog.  I'm not really sure what its purpose is, or who (other than a known few)  I connect to through it.  There are a few people (you know who you are) who I definitely want to keep up with.   As for anyone else who stumbles by reading, I'm not sure I want to keep posting my thoughts publicly.  I still do post a lot of my thoughts and report on a lot of my own actions, in specific areas, and those outlets are found elsewhere.  As for this little journal full of random divulgences?  The future is murky.

Well, until I write my last post, I'll keep on posting.  And I'm definitely not disappearing, I'm just moving in other directions.  Thanks for reading... Keep in touch (and that's meant sincerely, not as a hollow "Bye!" substitute.)  Happy blog writing and reading....

If this sounded like a negative post, it assuredly was meant to be positive.  It might have a bittersweet  tone, because I'm "graduating."  The operative word in "growing pains" is the little bit of necessary "pain."  I revived this blog only to keep it as a health journal for someone else, and I'm not sure there's a lot to report there, except steady and continued improvement, which is great, but hardly makes for scintillating conversation.  As for me and my current new operating procedures, the pain is worth the gain. I wouldn't be out there pulling my figurative hamstrings if it wasn't worth every second of effort to get somewhere new and see some new sights.

Well... Until next time!

This one's for the doctor

For my most loyal reader, because I know he will be stopping by:

Are the pharm reps pushing this one yet?  Whether or not, I would like an Rx, STAT!

😁

The blood pressure cuff says...

Here's something to write about.  Mister grapeswrites decided to ditch one of his meds - the blood pressure one - right before talking it over with the doctor - who said, "Better track your BP for a while and then go off it, and we'll also check it next time you come in..." But being headstrong similar to the actual grapeswrites, he did exactly that except not after tracking it for a while first.  He tracked it exactly once before throwing this medication out and informing the doctor he was doing so.

Since then, he did the responsible thing by having a BP cuff priority mailed, and now he does check it regularly.  Let me tell you, these contraptions are better than they used to be just a few years ago - at least as I remember it.  It's the regular squeeze-your-arm thing, but by the time you think it is getting started, the reading pops up for you.  And his have been about:

107/70

REGULARLY!  It wasn't a fluke; it wasn't a one-time thing.. 120s have been seen, but 9 out of ten times it's teens or zeros, such as 105/68, etc.  AWESOME ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I got to read mine, also, and found out that mine can creep into the 120s/80s, and I'm not sure why... but other times it's down around 110/70 or even ten points lower on each.  With a pulse around 60 avg. or I've seen 51.  Is this bad?  The machine at the store gave me a "good" but not "great" for the 51 but I say it's OK since I feel fine and I can perambulate myself at any speed I want (oddly, I had just ambled myself into the store when I got that reading) and as for his, I think I see it around 80 a lot of the time, when it's been 90-100 or more in the past.  I understand the heart rate varies among individuals as a genetic trait, as well as being influenced by factors such as physical fitness levels and a bunch of others.

That's all I've got today, but that was a lot, eh?

Edit:  As of last night, after writing this post. his was high 120s over 78 or so; a few hours later after sitting around watching TV a while it was taken again and was very good, like 110/65 or so.  Mine was about 103/60.

The scale says...

A new scale came into the house, and it is because one person needs to lose 4 pounds.  Strangely, the scale is not for either of the adults.  Yet we were the first ones to step on it.

Adult 1 thought the number would read near or under 220, but actually read over 230 (by a few pounds.)  BUMMER.

Adult 2 thought the number would read in the low 150s but actually read 158.  Let me say I was just glad that... um, I mean, Adult 2 was just glad not to get on that scale a month ago when 160+ would have scorched my eyes.

It appears to be accurate, because the person for whom the scale was primarily purchased weighed the exact amount on it as was determined at the doctor's the other day.  So the scale is not the defective element here.

I'm not into scales and pounds because I think they truly give only a rough approximation of what is going on.  Yet, the scale tales will probably continue now that the blasted thing sits, waiting to dole out judgment, near our front door.

I said I wouldn't post measurements or pounds or pics, but it looks like I slipped in a cheat on the pounds front.  It's not like "Adult 1" is going to be reading this.  If he does, I'll make up some excuse about not understanding... Just kidding.  I own up to it when I go back on my word, and in this case, I don't think the opinion was very strongly voiced before I gave some kind of tacit agreement... In fact, I don't even remember what was said, exactly.  Is anyone reading this?  One thing is for sure... Adult 1 reads this blog less often than he would read, for example, a horoscope, and I also have a good feel for matters about which he cares approximately less than fiddlesticks about.  So let's move on with this blog, and I have a strong feeling that pics may come about next; otherwise, it's going to be some boring tales of "round and round she goes, where she stops, nobody knows" (I bought the old-style dial-and-needle scale.)